I need “real” friends – Am I that unlucky?

I think there’s something wrong with me. I can’t score any "real" friends. Or close friends, or whatever you call them. The kind of friends you hang with outside of the workplace or school. The ones you might invite over sometimes. Or go places and have fun. I don’t have any friends like that.

To me, my definition of a friend is someone that you know pretty well enough, and the relationship between you two is relatively good. So it’s pretty broad. In that context, I probably have TONS of friends. But not many close friends by my side. Why? I haven’t figured it out yet, but I have suspecting reasons.

Every day, during the whole summer, I’ve practically been stowed away at my house. I live in this new neighborhood, and most of the people that have moved here are new to the area, and none of them seem to catch my eye. Not even for a small friendship. Maybe one or two, but not people I really want to hang out with. So I’m stuck here. I could walk to some neighborhoods not so far away, but I don’t expect to see that many friends, and most of the interesting people live like more than a mile away across the Sam Houston Tollway. So, I’m stuck here, unless I manage to get a ride. Location is the best option to making friends if you ask me. If you live close to someone of interest, there’s a good chance you’ll have a great relationship, since you’re not far away.

So I’ve been practically alone all summer, well not if you include my boring family. The times that I did go out for awhile, like to the supermarket or store, I didn’t see much anyone I knew. There was this annoying girl, who’s name I can’t recall, and a few cashiers I knew, but not that well. So far, I haven’t really seen anyone. Where do all the teenagers hang out in Houston?

I did go out once, with some friends to watch them perform at Java Junction. Empire Central was playing, and I thought they were pretty good. For once, it felt good to be out with friends. Just that time, but it was at least one time.

I think I must be boring. I don’t have any big specific interests in anything. I’m not a big fan of any sport, arts, video games, computers, cars, or anything. Do I even do anything when I’m at home?

Maybe it’s because I’m ugly. I’m not that great looking, but I didn’t think it was that bad. Like any other teenager, I try to control my level of acne, but maybe it’s enough. I’m only like 5"7 or 5"8. I’m thin at the top and have scrawny arms, though my thighs seem to be rather large in my opinion. I do have abs, but nobody can see it through my shirt. I have boring black hair, and dumb brown eyes. I’ve been growing a mustache, in hopes I might look better. Not so much.

Ok, so now I’m just rambling. But life is lonely for me, and I’m worried I might become a hermit one day. I’m social enough at school, it’s just that I don’t see anyone else beyond that.

I don’t have tons of money to spend on and outing. Then again, I don’t ask for an allowance or have a temp job.

I also can’t drive yet. So my only way to go out, is if I have a ride available.

Life sucks for me.


5 responses to “I need “real” friends – Am I that unlucky?

  1. Oh, I see. Well it\’s a falcon, my school\’s mascot. To be more exact, a peregrine falcon. The Jersey Village Falcons. Good eye. 😛

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